White Coat Ceremony

The other day, my classmate, D, and I were lucky enough to give a welcome speech to the incoming MS1s at their White Coat Ceremony.  Here is a copy of our speech (with our notes included in brackets).  Enjoy!

Hi Class of 2016!  I’m D, AMSG Co-President.

And I’m J, 4^th year class Co-president.  On behalf of the class of 2013 and the rest of the student body, we’d like to congratulate you on starting medical school!  This is a huge accomplishment and it is an honor to share this moment with you and your family and friends. 

[pause]

J:  Aaand… That’s all we’ve got for you.  We’ve been kind of busy watching the Olympics, [coughs] learning medicine, and we didn’t get a chance to actually prepare a speech for you.  Sooo… good job guys!

[J&D give a thumbs up with cheesy smiles]

iPad torch

D: But really, the Olympic Fever, commonly found among medical students and diagnosed by the inability to focus on anything but the games of the 30^th Olympiad got us thinking about what a team effort medicine really is.

D: We can think of tonight as the Opening Ceremonies.  Sure, there’s no torch… unless… is there an app for that?  [J: holds up ipad with torch app… F YEAH!!!!] (Aside: Medical education in the digital age!)  But I’m pretty sure you all just paraded in front of us to receive your coats and we’ll have an awesome performance by the medleys to come. 

J: More important than the ceremony is what happened before the ceremony.  Like the Olympians in this year’s games, you have all worked hard to get here.  Years of school, hours of volunteering, and numerous research projects later, here you are.  You’ve made it.  And for that, you should be truly proud of yourselves.

[applause]

D: Don’t get too comfortable, though.  You still have your work cut out for you.  Luckily, the Admissions Office knows how to pick a great team.  Soon, you’ll have study groups formed and next thing you know, you’ll have made some of the closest friends of your life.  Look to your left, look to your right.  By the end of medical school, you will have made out with one of them.

[nailed it!]

J: But seriously, we already have 3 engagements within our class… so, just be careful when you pick your study group.

D: Every team has its uniform and for medicine it is the white coat.  In receiving your white coat today, you have taken your first true step towards becoming a doctor.  With wearing the white coat comes the responsibility to discover, teach, and heal.  And while your white coat’s short length conveys your humble position as a student, your patients may not know the difference and will turn to you for their care, regardless. 

Class of 2016 taking the Oath

J: Over the past three years, D and I have learned that 50% of medicine is looking the part (just kidding, Dean Clayman).  Here are some Do’s and Don’ts to help you avoid making rookie mistakes and so you can look like a pro on the wards, or at least at the Clinical Skills Center:

[for this section, why don’t we model the “DO” examples and get the medleys to come out for the DO NOT]

J: Let’s start with a big one that for some reason, people have a tough time grasping: Cleanliness .  Do: try and keep your coat clean.  Unfortunately this is the cleanest your coat will ever be for the next four years.  Try to wash and press your coat as often as you have time to do laundry.  Use bleach and hot water.  Stain remover is your friend.  

D: DO NOT: Walk around with dirt rings on your sleeves and coffee stains down your front.  Would you trust a doctor who smells like Pig Pen and looks like you’re guaranteed to catch 10 diseases from his coat?  Neither will your patients.  [med student approaches pt looking dirty and pt runs away in disgust]

D: Next up, Writing Utensils.  DO: Carry a couple pens and, perhaps, a hi-lighter.  You’ll look like a star when your resident needs a pen and you magically provide one before she even has a chance to ask.

J: DO NOT: Carry a 24-color crayola marker pack unless you’re using it to color every muscle of the upper extremity.   Not only will this weigh down your coat, you will feel like a fool when you bend down to examine a patient and your pens fall all over him.  [med student with a bunch of pens in coat bends over to examine a patient and dumps out contents of coat and scrambles to pick them up]

J: Definitely stock your pockets with those tools you’ve always wanted to use--your stethoscope, penlight, reflex hammer, surgilube (J&D: because you just never know).

D: But DO NOT go overboard.  You’ll find that the weight of all of these tools quickly adds up and we’ve heard of many med students acquiring back problems from lugging a 20+ pound coat around all day.  Plus, is that speculum really necessary on your psychiatry rotation? [med student walks out completely burdened with stuff… coat stuffed and awkwardly weighed down… hold’s up the speculum sheepishly]

D: It’s always helpful to carry a snack with you.  Granola bars are great because you can quickly gobble them on the run between seeing patients or going to meetings.

J: DO NOT: Make your coat a lunch buffet.  It’s just… gross. [maybe get in ‘n out boxes or something to put in the coat, med student sipping from a straw]

J: Finally, there’s flare.  Just like a gold medal, there’s nothing I love more than a good accessory.  Today, you received your first few items of flare: pins that represent your team – UCI SOM and our mission to “discover, teach, heal” and to include Humanism in medicine. 

D: DO NOT: get too over the top.  This is not Chili's and you are not Michael Phelps.  Plus, what is that boa?  [med students come out with various pieces of bling, medal, boa]

And with these tips, combined with the camaraderie and support of your classmates and faculty and staff here at UCI, you’ll be sure to find yourself atop the podium in just 4 years (or 7 if you’re an MD/PhD).   We are excited to welcome you to our team.

UCI chant?!

And now, we’d like to introduce the Medleys, UCI SOM’s talented singing group.  See.  We told you it was like the opening ceremonies ;)