MS3

Oh, hey guys! Yeah, I know. It's been a couple of months since I've written anything. Sorry. It's just that things are kind of busy during third year! And stressful! Plus, up until last week, I was elbow deep in vaginas (okay, sorry. That was gross. And only partially true).

I had meant to write at least one post during each of my rotations, but that failed after R1 (pediatrics). Now, I've completely missed OB/GYN (R2) and I'm onto Family Medicine (R3).

Here are some general thoughts about being a third year medical student:

• My new name is "Medical Student." As in, "Medical Student! Shred this document." Or "Medical Student! There is a chart in the hall and someone needs to see that patient." Or "Medical Student, you are sitting in my chair... Now, you're standing too close behind me." I've realized that I'm pretty much interchangeable with any other person in a short white coat. The other day a resident (who I had worked closely with for a couple of weeks) mistook me for my classmate, who is blonde. The best part was that he just walked over and started listing off tasks I should do while I shook my head in defiance (I was on a completely different service at that point). In his defense, he felt pretty bad about it.
• I feel like an idiot 90% of the time. Simple tasks, like cutting a suture or making a phone call, are suddenly incredibly difficult. You guys! "Cutting a suture" sounds fancy, but it is literally cutting a string with scissors. But you have to hold the scissors a certain way. And you don't want to cut the string too long/short. Sometimes the string is thicker and more difficult to cut. And you have to use the tip of the scissors so as not to risk cutting tissue. AH! STRESS. Don't even get me started on phone calls...
• I live in a constant state of anxiety/discomfort. This is because we are constantly changing services or clinic locations; just last week, I worked at 3 different clinics, each one totally different in the way things were done from the other. Every time we are in a new place, we need to figure out our roles and expectations for us. For example, at one clinic I was simply shadowing (lame) while earlier that morning I had been independently seeing patients, writing notes, and presenting my findings to the attending physician who did very little to double check what I had done. Of course, nobody explicitly says what we're supposed to be doing; we just have to figure it out. This can be on a even more basic level. Once a fellow med student and I awkwardly hovered in the residents' room with our lunches for 10 minutes, waiting for the residents to give us permission to eat/tell us where the lunch room was. We would have asked them, but they were in deep conversation (basically gossiping) and it was not our place to interrupt.

Despite these things (and I'm sure there are more - feel free to add your own experiences in the comments), Third Year is fun! Yup, you heard me. Even though I feel like an idiot and I'm constantly nervous about screwing up, I finally get to talk to patients and do doctory things. For example, a couple of weeks ago I delivered a baby. You guys, I delivered an effing baby! So what I'm saying is even though I'm kind of a stressed out mess, I'm also kind of loving it.

In Class: Best Class Ever

Today we had the BEST CLASS EVER (possible overstatement, but I feel pretty confident about this one).

The class was about old people and their risk of falling and what that can mean for them and us. Not only was there a physician, a physical therapist, and an occupational therapist (who goes by "The Magnificent"), there were 5 adorable seniors there to share their experiences with us. You guys, I'm mostly interested in working with younger patient populations (specifically pregnant ladies and their fetuses/babies... can't get much younger than that!), but I have to say it: old people can be pretty darn cute.

But the old people were only a small part of why today's class was the best ever. The real reason was that we had the lecture in Tamkin, the first year lecture hall. You see, in med school, we sit in lecture for hours at a time and rather than changing classrooms for each class/topic, we stay put and the lecturers come to us. The first years have all of their classes in Tamkin, while the MS2s "graduate" to Nelson (at first, I thought this was a downgrade, but now I'm not so sure).

As creatures of habit, people established where in the auditorium they sat early on during first year. Since I know you're wondering, I was a left-side front person (There's a lot of Left Side pride in our class; we even made up a dance during last year's retreat... and then got everyone to do it again at this year's retreat). Where you sit in lecture is serious business and if someone ever changed things up and sat in your spot, it could throw off your whole day (I remember this happened once and I literally just stood there blankly for a few minutes, unable to respond appropriately).

Anyway, for whatever reason, when our whole class returned to Tamkin today there was an air of total excitement/joy. Everyone went to their old seats for "old time's sake" and we were all really happy about it. Like kind of weirdly/pathetically happy about it. Is this what our lives have become? Are we so deprived of fun times that the highlight of our day/week/month is a return to last year's lecture hall and sitting in our old seats?

I don't know. Actually, I don't even really care. All I know is that today I showed up to class expecting an average lecture about the "Functional Status Exam." Instead I got a lecture about falling with cute old people, hilarious student demos on falling and taking your sweaty socks off, and a functional reach competition. This was all taught to me by The Magnificent while I basked in the glory of sitting in my MS1 seat. Like I said before, BEST CLASS EVER.

Teach me how to Dougie

Last weekend at retreat something really awkward happened to me. In fact, it was so embarrassing that I've waited over a week to share it with you guys.

I was at a party in someone's hotel room when "Teach Me How To Dougie" came on and EVERYONE in the room started to aggressively do The Dougie. Except for me. Because I had never heard the song before (and so obviously knowing the dance was out of the question). I was so stunned/caught off guard that I kind of just froze (and/or blacked out... I'm still not entirely sure).

Finally, I came to and asked some kid what the song was. "You've never heard this?!" He kind of laughed. (OMG, I thought, I'm officially old and totally out of touch).

"Wait," I said, "When did this come out? Over the summer?" I was desperate at this point to prove that I'm not that socially retarded after all... I'd been out of the country for 2 months and pretty much away from all forms of media (If you remember, I didn't even know about those effing iPads!!).

"Uh, yeah sure." (The real answer: no).

"Oh thank god," I replied. "You see, I was out of the country... I didn't hear any new music." (such desperation!! As if he cared about my lame excuse).

He kind of nodded, rolled his eyes a little, and Dougied away from me.

OMG, you guys!! It was mortifying! And so, so weird! Imagine an entire room of people breaking out in song and dance and you being completely out of the loop. It was awful.

For those of you still out of the loop (suckers!), here's the link to the YouTube video (sorry, couldn't embed it).

And for those of you who need a more family-friendly lesson on how to Dougie, here are some kids from Glee walking you through the dance. (GLEE, you guys!!)

MS2

Okay everyone. I've been feeling some pressure to blog, which I totally get, since LAMe! is so awesome. But the thing is that my second year of med school (aka MS2) started last week. I think you all know what that means: My super sweet and exciting summer life has disappeared and now I'm back to my boring med student life.

Some of you (like all 3 of LAMe's followers) may remember that last year I experienced a little bit of writer's block as a result of MS1. This mostly had to do with the fact that all I ever thought about was school (boring) and boys (embarrassing). Umm... not that much has changed since last year.

So anyway, I need some help coming up with topics. Feel free to comment with requests or ideas and maybe this will help keep LAMe! alive during grueling MS2 (please!).

In case you need some help, I will provide examples of good, bad, and mediocre ideas for LAMe!

Good:

• MS2, KW, is awesome.
• S's lost pink waterbottle.
• Okay, so I can't really think of any right now (hence this post)

Mediocre:

• My new haircut
• Nelson Auditorium vs Tamkin Hall

Bad:

• Big Robbins vs Medium Robbins (even though this is such a hot topic)
• Preparing for USMLE Step 1

Okay, so I think (hope) you get the idea! Also, remember I love all things that have to do with dating and ridiculousness (though "Microbiology Made Ridiculously Simple" does not count as ridiculousness), but please be nice (we're not trying to ruin lives here).

So... umm... comment away!!

News Alert: "How to Date a Med Student"

In case I haven't written enough about med school and dating, it looks like Fox News has jumped on the bandwagon with "How to Date a Med Student."

Sadly, I can identify with most (all) of these...

Also, which is a more reliable news source: LAMe! or Fox News?

In class: "Question."

I love it when somebody has a question during lecture and they wait with their hand in the air only to receive zero acknowledgement from the professor. No, okay. What I truly love is how people feel the need to say the word “Question” as they wait with their hand in the air. I mean, I get it. They need to get the professor’s attention. But still. It is so…. weird.

I guess it’s because I’ve never seen/heard anything like it before. I’ve gone to small schools pretty much my entire life. With a maximum class size of 30, there was almost zero chance of getting lost in the crowd. If anything, you had to be on your toes, because there was a pretty high chance of being called on randomly. The only exception to my history of small-scale education was studying abroad in Scotland; I guess the British are too polite to yell out “Question” in the middle of a lecture.

Things don’t just stop at the person who is asking the question. Sometimes, a “Good Samaritan” will feel the need to lend a helping hand (or voice) to a classmate otherwise silenced by a blind professor. “Question.” We hear from the back of the classroom (these “Helper Bees” are usually in the back, where they have a good view of the entire class). The lecturer stops midsentence, and scans the auditorium in the direction of the voice. The class turns to see the source of the Question. Meanwhile, someone sitting in a completely different part of the lecture hall is still holding her hand in the air. Finally, contact has been made between Lecturer and Helper. “Down there,” Helper responds, pointing to the student with her hand up.

The best part: when the question, which has now caused quite a disruption, is something like, “Will this be posted online?”

In class: Sleepers

Okay. I know. I need to write more posts to this thing or LAMe! LAMe! will just be… lame. (Also, that last sentence was pretty lame in and of itself… I’m sorry). My problem is that there are pretty much only two things I think about: school and boys. School is boring to anyone not in med school (okay, yeah…and even to those who are in med school). And my thoughts on boys/dating are just kind of pathetic/embarrassing. Soo… that leaves me kind of low on topics.

Anyway, in an attempt to keep this thing going, I’ve decided to bore you all and start a series on my favorite things that happen in class. You see, I’m a class-goer (meaning, I’m almost always in class). I’m also pretty much terrible at paying attention. Instead I do really important things like daydream (class is probably my most productive daydreaming time of the day) and people-watch (I would definitely say that socializing is another big motivator behind my class-goer status).

Which leads me to today’s topic: Sleepers. My favorite thing to do in class is look for people who have fallen asleep. I’m not sure why, but it’s pretty much always entertaining to me. And it happens literally every day. There’s one guy who basically sits in the front row and nods off during almost every lecture.

Today, the professor asked if his review session was useful and we all agreed… and then noticed that a girl sitting directly in front of him was completely passed out. AMAZING!

Sometimes, if the people are sleeping in a particularly funny position, or if I’m feeling particularly bored, I’ll point out the Sleepers to the people who I sit next to. If they see someone napping, they'll give me a heads-up... it's a reciprocity thing. And if people are feeling especially feisty they’ll whip out their camera phone and take pictures and post it in our “Narcolepsy Anonymous” group of fb. So good.

Brush 'em! (or not)

Move over gingivitus, there's a new player in town wreaking havoc on the gums of healthy young adults across America. Who is this sinister character causing widespread gum recession, you may ask? The answer may SHOCK you. It is... harsh brushing!

That's right my friends, overly exuberant brushing, particularly in a horizontal motion, can cause gum recession in an otherwise healthy mouth. This is a serious matter, because your gums don't really grow back! And, though this may not be at all surprising, your teeth really need gums! Currently, the main way to repair gum recession is through gingival grafting (taking gum tissue from nearby or the roof of your mouth and covering the recession). Sounds intense!

I bring the important issue of overactive brushing up, because it has recently come to my attention that many of my friends (and myself) experience this problem - and have been told so by dentists.

Umm... of course we're aggressive brushers! We're med students, over-achievers to the max! We've been brushing our little hearts out to make sure our teeth were perfectly clean since we could hold a mini toothbrush in our tiny hands. When we were younger, the dentists praised us for our efforts: "My, what a great job you're doing brushing your teeth! Go get a toy from The Drawer." Positive reinforcement? I live for that stuff! (I'm not joking. When I had my braces, I got a "Best Patient" award from the orthodontist... which I'm sure they give like 90% of their patients... and I was thrilled. I was also 11).

I bet the dentists, praying kids would brush their teeth at least once a week, didn't see this coming. Now they have to put gum grafts in the mouths of all those over-achieving med students out there.